Rollercoaster

So far this year, my life has existed only in atmospheric highs and abysmal lows.

I was back in the mood to write, my photography was amazingly received-- so much so that I've been considering a new academic track, work was extremely profitable, men seemed to be coming out of the woodwork, my hockey team was finally living up to their potential, and a new aura of hope hung over the city.

And then I lost my beloved cat, my professions of love fell on Neil's deaf ears, Cory admitted having a wife, Seth patched things up with his, I feel so guilty for thinking that I'd trade the cat I have left to get the other one back, I sunk just a bit further into this depression, I have no desire even to write these short paragraphs...

Now, just to top off this mess, my dear friend's three month old son died unexpectedly two weeks ago.  (Am I the only one who finds that stupid that we feel the need to qualify 'died' with 'unexpectedly'-- is there really any other way to die other than unexpectedly when the deceased in question is under the age of, oh, I don't know, 60?)

I'm less than 24 hours from my 37th birthday and still living my life like I'm 18.  Sometimes it doesn't surprise me at all that I'm still single...

I'm sure I'll be back to looking on the brighter side of things tomorrow... it's just that it seems so dark tonight.

Comments

[Chris]

I'm married with three kids and still act like I'm 12. It's all about priorities. If being 18 at 37 is who you are then at least you're not betraying yourself. Hell, maybe you should find an 18 year old guy. It's unlikely he'll be married.

Unfortunately, there are children born with defects that require parents to watch them fade such that their passing is expected. I don't know if knowing would be better or worse. When things are that bad maybe it doesn't matter.